Have A Heart, Use Your Brain

Seriously Off Her Meds
BAD BEHAVIOR, BIZARRE, MASSACHUSETTS, PHARMACY, USA | HEALTHY | FEBRUARY 14, 2018
(I’m a pharmacist at a small, but very busy, chain store. I am working the register along with one of the technicians, due to us being understaffed.)

Me: “Hi! How are you doing today, ma’am?”

Customer: “Israel!”

Me: “Pardon?”

Customer: “Israel!”

(At the pharmacy register, in order to pick up a prescription, we must be provided with the first and last name, along with the date of birth.)

Me: “Is that your name, ma’am?”

Customer: “Israel!”

Me: *getting frustrated since there is a line behind her going up two aisles* “May I please have your name?”

Customer: “Israel! My name is Israel!”

Me: “Okay, thank you. May I please have your last name?”

Customer: “Israel!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. I misunderstood. I thought your first name was Israel. Could I please have your first name, then?”

Customer: “Israel! My name is Israel! What do you not understand? This is ridiculous! I demand to speak to the pharmacist!”

Me: *trying not to scream* “I’m very sorry, ma’am. I am the pharmacist. I just need your first and last name in order to view your profile. Could you please give me your first name followed by your last?”

Customer: *she is now screaming at this point* “This is unbelievable!”

(She looks at the people in line behind her for support. They all give me a sympathetic look, instead.)

Customer: “From now on, I’m taking my business to [Other Retail Chain Pharmacy]!”

Me: “I’m very sorry for the inconvenience, ma’am. Could I please have your first and last name, in order to speed up the transaction? We are quite busy today.”

Customer: “Israel! My name is Israel! Israel [Last Name].”

(Now that I finally have her first and last name in the system, I am prompted with the screen that asks for the date of birth.)

Me: “Thank you, ma’am. And could I have your date of birth, please?”

Customer: “What kind of pharmacy is this?! What will you want next? My social security number?!”

Me: “That won’t be necessary, ma’am.”

(By this time, the technician at the register next to me has gone through about three patients, while I am still with this lady.)

Customer: “My birthday is [date]!”

Me: “All right, thank you. It looks like we have three prescriptions ready for you. Let me go get those for you.” *I fetch the prescriptions and finish the transaction fairly normally* “All right, ma’am. Before you leave, do you have any questions about the medications?”

Customer: “Yes. I would like to speak to the pharmacist!”

Me: “I am the pharmacist, ma’am.”

Customer: “No, you’re not!”

Me: “I can assure you that I am, in fact, the pharmacist, ma’am.”

Customer: *all disgruntled* “Well… Well… I want to speak to the pharmacist who was here yesterday! Where is he?!”

Me: “That was our other pharmacist.”

Customer: “Well, I demand to speak to him! Go fetch him!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. He isn’t here today.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous! I have nothing but trouble at this store!”

Me: “I’m sorry that you feel that way, ma’am. I can answer any questions that you have about the medication, though.”

Customer: “No! I’ll just die! No one can tell me how to take this medication! You don’t even have a pharmacist here! I’m going to die because of your incompetence!”

Me: “Ma’am, as I’ve said, I am the pharmacist, and I would be more than happy to walk you through the proper way to take your medications. If you would like, you can come back tomorrow, too, and the other pharmacist will be here.”

Customer: “Fine! Show me, since you think I’m too stupid to take my own medications!”

Me: “I never said you were too stupid, ma’am.”

Customer: “Yes, you did! But whatever. Show me!”

(I instructed the lady on how to take her medications, and she finally walked away. Shortly after, the store manager came down to the pharmacy asking what happened. I asked what he was referring to and he stated that a lady was complaining that I “verbally and mentally abused her.”)

Stop And Think For A Period
HOBART, IGNORING & INATTENTIVE, PHARMACY, TASMANIA | HEALTHY | FEBRUARY 5, 2018
(In Australia, purchasing certain medications requires the cashier, by law, to ascertain for whom the medication is intended and whether or not they’ve used the medication before. It’s about half an hour before closing time and it’s been a busy day, so I’m running on autopilot, when a man comes up to the counter.)

Male Customer: “Can I have some [period pain medication], please?”

Me: “Sure. That’s just for yourself, and you’ve used it before?”

Not Banking On That Pharmacy
JERK, MONEY, PHARMACY, USA | RIGHT | JANUARY 31, 2018
(I work in a regional pharmacy and convenience store chain. One of the services we offer is check cashing, but with a hefty fee, since we are not a bank. The minimum fee is $3, and it shifts to 2% of the check for any amount over $150. The fee is automatically deducted from the check total, and we give the customer the difference. A woman comes in on a Sunday afternoon, demanding we cash her check. Instead of going to customer service, she heads to the pharmacy counter and tries to give them her check. The head pharmacist calls down to me that I will have a customer soon.)

Me: “Hello! You want a check cashed?”

(The customer, an elderly woman, pushes the check at me with a humph.)

Customer: “Yes, that one. My daughter is in town from DC, and I have to take her out to dinner.”

Me: *punching in the check total to get the fee amount* “All right, the fee for check cashing is 2% of the check, so for $259.50, it’s going to be a $5.19 fee.”

Customer: “You’re kidding! Well! This is the last time I do this; I’m pulling out all my prescriptions!”

Me: *thinking that’s a weird knee-jerk reaction* “Okay. Did you still want to cash this check?”

Customer: “Well, yes! I have to take my daughter out to dinner! She came up here from DC! This is ridiculous; I want to talk to a manager! You don’t do this to loyal customers. I’m going to pull out all my prescriptions, and I have a lot!”

(I page the manager while she fumes, repeatedly going back to her prescriptions and how she is going to take them all out first thing tomorrow morning. The manager walks in, and she starts berating him, too.)

Customer: “I have been a customer here for years. You don’t charge loyal customers $5 for cashing checks! I’m going to pull out my prescriptions!”

Manager: “That’s not our fee; the check cashing company sets that. It’s the fee they charge for using their services.”

(The customer humphs for a bit while the manager goes through the procedure, which is tedious and done on a separate machine. She goes silent for a moment before perking back up, turning to me while pointing at the manager.)

Customer: “No! Who’s above him? Who’s the highest manager?!”

Manager: “The store manager.”

Customer: “And who is that?”

Me: “[Store Manager].”

Customer: “Is he here?”

Me: “No.”

Customer: “Is he here tomorrow?!”

Manager: “Yes, [Store Manager] will be in tomorrow.”

Customer: “Good! I’m going to get my money back and pull out all my prescriptions!”

(We hand her the keypad to put in her social security number, and she acts like it’s the most complex device she’s ever used. It’s a nine-digit keypad with a green button and a red button. All you have to do is type the number, hit the green button, type the number again for confirmation, and hit the green button again. It takes a lot of prodding, interspersed with, “What do I do now?!” We also have to key in her driver’s license, the confirmation code from the receipt, the state, the day of the transaction, and so forth.)

Customer: “Why is this taking so long?!“

Me: “It’s a process. We have to go through extra steps and security, since we aren’t a bank.”

Customer: “Well, who do I talk to about pulling out my prescriptions?”

Me: “The pharmacy.”

(She goes strangely quiet after that, letting us complete the transaction with minor grumbling. I count out the amount of the check, minus the fee, making sure I am on camera as I do. I proceed to lay it flat on the counter to show her while I count it again, but she snatches it from me.)

Customer: “No! I’ll count it! I can’t wait to come in tomorrow and talk to your manager! I’m going to pull out all my prescriptions!”

(She finally takes her money and storms off. The head pharmacist pokes his head in.)

Pharmacist: “So, how’d that go?”

(I relay the whole story and he just laughs, shaking his head. He goes on to tell me how she’s been a chronic pain in the pharmacy’s neck for years.)

Pharmacist: “She always says that. If I had a dollar for every time she threatened to pull out her prescriptions, I’d be a lot closer to retirement.”

At Least It’s Still Just A Penny For Your Thoughts
MONEY, OVERHEARD, PENNSYLVANIA, PHARMACY, USA | HEALTHY | JANUARY 24, 2018
(I am in line waiting to pick up a prescription. The customer at the register is taking longer than usual. The worker tells him to step to the side while they try to sort out the problem. I overhear this between the man who is picking up the prescription and his friend.)

Friend: “It’s only three dollars.”

Man: “I ain’t got that kind of money. Do you know anybody with that kind of money? These is crazy times we live in.”

Going For The Condom Minimum
BIZARRE, GROCERY STORE, MISSOURI, PHARMACY, USA | HEALTHY | JANUARY 22, 2018
(A woman comes up to our night cashier.)

Customer: “I need assistance at the pharmacy case.”

(The cashier pages me to the pharmacy case, as I’m the only one with the key after the pharmacist leaves. I arrive at the case.)

Me: “What items do you need?”

Customer: *hesitates for a moment* “I need condoms.”

Me: *opens the case* “You’re welcome to pick out any of the boxes that you’d like.”

(She picks up a few different boxes, shakes each one, then sets it back down. Then, she turns to me and asks

Customer: “Do you know which one of these feels the best for guys?”

Me: *more confused than surprised by the question* “I’m sorry. I’m afraid I can’t help you there.”

Customer: “Do you know which one fits best, then?”

Me: “I can’t help you with that. I’ve never used any of those.”

Customer: *exasperated sigh* “Oh, well. Better safe than sorry.”

(She put the condoms down, grabbed a pregnancy test, and walked away without another word.)

Hey, Google, What Kind Of Cancer Do I Have?
CONNECTICUT, PHARMACY, STUPID, USA | HEALTHY | JANUARY 18, 2018
(I stop in a pharmacy to pick up some medication. I hear the following from a lady next to me.)

Woman: “I want to buy this!”

(She points at medicine on the shelf behind the pharmacist.)

Pharmacist: “That’s prescription medication. You can’t buy that. I’m sorry.”

Woman: “I NEED IT!”

Pharmacist: “Okay, well, we still can’t give you the medication. You need a prescription.”

Woman: “No! WEBMD SAID I HAVE CANCER AND I NEED THIS!”

Pharmacist: “Ma’am, I recommend you see your doctor before you get a self-diagnosis off of the Internet.”

Woman: “You’re a doctor! And I KNOW I HAVE CANCER!”

Pharmacist: “Actually, I’m not a—”

Woman: “YOU ALL WANT ME TO DIE OF CANCER! I AM REPORTING YOU TO THE POLICE!”

(She then proceeds to run out of the store, knocking down several displays and screaming “I NEED PENICILLIN! I HAVE CANCER!”)

Me: *mumbling* “How does she think penicillin will cure cancer, anyway?”

Pharmacist: “That’s not even penicillin.”

That’s What I (N)Said
BRITISH COLUMBIA, CANADA, PHARMACY | HEALTHY | JANUARY 14, 2018
CONTENT WARNING: This story contains content of a medical nature. It is not intended as medical advice.

Customer: *holding a box of OTC medication* “Excuse me. My wife is allergic to the Niacide family.”

Me: “Pardon? Do you mean NSAIDs?”

Customer: “No! NIACIDES!”

(I give him a puzzled look.)

Customer: “You know, ibuprofen and stuff!”

Me: “Right… NSAIDs.”

Customer: “Oh, whatever. Can she take this or not?”

(Then he showed me a box of acetaminophen.)

Benzo Combo No No
PHARMACY, USA, VIRGINIA | HEALTHY | JANUARY 11, 2018
CONTENT WARNING: This story contains content of a medical nature. It is not intended as medical advice.

(I work in a popular chain pharmacy/convenience store as a pharmacy technician. It is a week before Christmas and patients are swarming in to get medications refilled before they depart for the holidays. I’m currently working at a prescription filling station that is directly across from where the pharmacist verifies them, allowing us to talk as we work. Another technician takes in a couple of prescriptions and preps them for data entry; however, when the pharmacist spots them, he immediately sees a problem.)

Pharmacist: “Whoa, I am not filling this.”

Other Technician: “Why, what’s up?”

Pharmacist: “This drug combo, carisoprodol, benzo, and an opiate…”

Me: “Bad combo?”

Pharmacist: “It’s outright lethal. I need to speak with the patient.”

(We try to page the patient back to the pharmacy via the store intercom, but it appears that they’ve already left. The pharmacist decides to contact the doctor who prescribed the drug trio to alert them to the potentially fatal consequences. He immediately identifies this doctor as being a sketchy one that he has dealt with in the past. Nonetheless, he steels himself for the call and gets him on the line.)

Pharmacist: “Hi, I’m calling because of a couple of prescriptions that you’ve prescribed for [Patient]. When taken together these drugs are a potentially lethal combo. I wanted to see if perhaps we could if we could get the carisoprodol switched to, say Flexeril.”

Doctor: “There’s been no issues in the past.”

Pharmacist: “Right… but you are aware that is THE Unholy Trinity of drugs, correct? If nothing has happened previously then great, but all it takes is a single time or misstep and the patient is going to die. I highly suggest a switch here.”

Doctor: “I don’t want to do that.”

Pharmacist: *blinks* “So, just so we’re on the same page, you want to knowingly prescribe this potentially deadly combo to the patient, rather than switching?”

Doctor: “I’ve already discussed it with the patient. It’s fine.”

Pharmacist: “Okay, well, I’m going to notify the patient of your decision and make them aware of what’s going on here. I need to cover my bases.”

Doctor: “All right, sure.”

(The pharmacist was shocked by the nonchalant nature of the doctor, but decided to follow his gut instinct and not fill all three scripts. While there are noted instances of patients taking these drugs together, they are few and far between, and the benefits do not outweigh the risks; finally, the sketchy nature of the doctor meant that the pharmacist was less than comfortable doing so. He notified the patient of the situation (who seemed more disappointed with the fact that we wouldn’t fill all three drugs than with the fact that the combo was lethal) and wrote a note on the prescription stating that it was denied as well as our contact number should the patient try to have it filled elsewhere.)

Who Prescribed Some Madness?
ENGLAND, PHARMACY, UK | HEALTHY | JANUARY 4, 2018
(We have a new member of staff at the pharmacy and we’ve got a number of regulars who come in to get their weekly medications, often quite a few items. This employee somehow gets it into her head that anyone with a weekly prescription is a drug abuser. One of our regulars is on a lot of different pain medications.)

Regular: “Good morning! I’m here to pick up my prescriptions. My name is [Regular].”

(The new staff member goes out to the back of the store and comes back out a few minutes later.)

New Staff: “No, there isn’t anything.”

Regular: “I pick this up every week, and I know I have at least three months’ worth of repeats for all these from the doctor.”

New Staff: “No. No, we have nothing.”

Regular: *spotting our pharmacist who knows her very well* “Hi, [Pharmacist]! Got my weekly meds?”

Pharmacist: “Oh, yeah. I did them yesterday—”

New Staff: “No! No, you didn’t. We have nothing!” *to Regular* “You need to leave; we have nothing for you!”

Pharmacist: “Don’t be daft. I’ll go fetch them.” *heads to the back and comes out with a large bag* “Can I just check your address and date of birth?”

Regular: *gives details*

Pharmacist: “Yup, here you go. See you next week!”

New Staff: “I told her we had nothing! Why did you make me look like a liar?!”

Pharmacist: “Because you were lying? [Regular] comes in every week and I always have her meds done.”

New Staff: “I saw what she’s on. She’s a f****** druggie. You shouldn’t enable these people.”

Regular: “I beg your pardon?”

Pharmacist: “Okay, we do not treat customers like that. Whatever personal views you have on certain medications, you leave those views at home.”

New Staff: “She’s a druggie. Why would anyone else need [strong pain medication]?”

Regular: “Because half my lower spine was smashed in an accident and I live in constant, agonising pain?”

New Staff: “Shut up, druggie.”

Pharmacist: “Right. That’s it. Go home.”

(She was fired that day, and officially cautioned by the police when for two weeks afterward she kept hanging around the pharmacy entrance waiting for our regular customer so she could yell at them some more. We know this because she told EVERY other customer entering our store. Luckily, our regular has a good sense of humour and just laughed off the whole episode.)

At A Hair-Loss For Words
FINLAND, HEALTH & BODY, PHARMACY | HEALTHY | JANUARY 3, 2018
(The men in my family tend to start suffering from hair loss in their mid-20s, and mine seems to have started, so I go to a nearby pharmacy to buy certain shampoo recommended by my stepfather. Note that I have grown my hair for a few years and it’s currently some 18 to 20 inches long.)

Employee: “Hello, can I help you with anything?”

Me: “Yes, I was looking for certain shampoo but don’t remember the name of the product.”

Employee: “What kind of shampoo? For dry hair, or–”

Me: “For hair loss.”

Employee: *goes silent and stares at my long hair, then grabs a bottle off a shelf* “Well, we have this one.”

Me: “That’s the product; thank you!”

(I only realized what had happened after I got back home.)

Unfiltered Story #102197
AUSTRALIA, MELBOURNE, PHARMACY | UNFILTERED | DECEMBER 27, 2017
(The centre has lost power but we are still trading, doing everything manually)

Customer: “Can i have my repeat?”

Me: “I’m sorry but as i said, we have lost power and are able to print repeats but we will mail it out to you once the power comes back”

Customer: “But i want my repeat”

Me: “I’m sorry but we can’t print it”

(The customer rolls their eyes then proceedes to the checkout where we clearly state “Cash only” because of the power outage)

Customer: “I want to pay by card.”

Co worker: “I’m sorry but we have no power so we can’t use EFTPOS”

Customer: “But I want to pay by card”

Co worker: “I’m sorry, but the power is out so we can’t use the ETFPOS.”

Customer: “But I WANT to pay by card. Why did you cut the power on me. Put it back on”

Co worker: “We didn’t cut the power. The whole centre is out of power. We aren’t sure when the power will come back.”

Customer: “Well that’s your problem.”

(The customer storms off, without getting their items)

Obviously Not Stressing It Enough
OREGON, PHARMACY, USA | HEALTHY | DECEMBER 26, 2017
(My doctor has prescribed me a four-month supply of a new medicine, to see if it will help with my migraines. I get it filled for the first two months at my local pharmacy without a problem, but the third month I am told I have to call my insurance to sort out a problem. After fighting my way through the automated system and identifying myself

Me: “My pharmacy told me that I need to call you about one of my meds.”

Operator: “Yes, it looks like that has been flagged as a ‘maintenance medication’ in our system, so it can only be filled at a regular pharmacy twice. After that it needs to be filled as a three-month supply via mail order.”

(This is news to me, but then again, it is a new insurance plan, so I am not that familiar with it.)

Me: “Okay, but I only have two more months on this medication; my doctor just gave me a four-month script to see if it works for me.”

Operator: “Yes, you just need to get set up on our online system to get it in a three-month supply.”

Me: “That’s the problem: I don’t have three months left on it. Can I get a two-month supply?”

Operator: No, it has to be a three-month supply because it is a ‘maintenance medication.'”

Me: “But I only have two more months on this prescription; it’s a trial to see if it works.”

Operator: “That’s fine; just get set up on our online system and you can get a three-month supply from now on.”

Me: “No, I can’t. I probably won’t be on this that long, and my prescription is only for two more months. Are you saying I need to go to my doctor and get a new three-month prescription in order to fill my last two months?”

Operator: “No, you keep the same prescription; just order a three-month supply online. Do you need the website address?”

Me: “No, I think I need a new prescription, because mine is only for another two months.”

Operator: “No, it must be three months.”

Me: “So, I need to get a new prescription from my doctor for three-months’ worth, or stop taking it now?”

Operator: “No, just enter your prescription online and select ‘three-month supply.'”

Me: “But I don’t have three months left on this medication.”

Operator: *sighs loudly* “I can give you a one-time exception to pick up this month from your pharmacy, but after that you really need to start getting it in a three-month supply via mail order.”

(I decided three months would have to be enough of a trial on that medication; it wasn’t working anyway, and that phone call to get more definitely triggered a stress migraine.)

The Tale Is In The Yelling
ALABAMA, PHARMACY, USA | HEALTHY | DECEMBER 25, 2017
(I’m at a local pharmacy. Twenty minutes ago I dropped off a prescription and now I am picking it up.)

Pharmacist: “Yes, sir?”

Me: “Prescription for [My Name]?”

Pharmacist: “It’s not ready yet, but it should be in just a few minutes.”

Me: “Sure, that’s fine.”

(I go and sit down in the waiting area. The pharmacist walks over to another employee and whispers something to her, which I happen to overhear

Pharmacist: “Can you believe it? He actually didn’t yell at me!”

A Prescription By Any Other Name
PHARMACY, USA | HEALTHY | DECEMBER 21, 2017
(I go to my local pharmacy to drop off a prescription. As most pharmacies are, it is very busy with a full waiting area and they tell me there will be a wait for my medication. I browse the store for a while until I hear my name called over the intercom, and then get back in line to pick up the prescription. An elderly man who is also waiting for a prescription gets up from his chair and approaches me.)

Patient: “Are you Veronica? They just called a Veronica; are you her?”

(They definitely did not just call anyone named Veronica, and my name sounds nothing like Veronica, although they both do end in the letter ‘A.’)

Me: “Uh, no, sir, I’m not Veronica but my prescription is ready.”

Patient: “Well, if you’re not Veronica then your prescription is not ready so get out of line and wait like the rest of us!”

Me: “Sir, they called my name and I am going to pick up my prescription. Even if they didn’t I’m not cutting anyone in line or making anyone else wait longer, so please don’t shout at me.”

(At this point he started telling the whole waiting room that I was not Veronica and I was trying to steal Veronica’s prescription, but he was actually speaking very calmly so no one really paid him any mind. They called me up to the desk and I got my medication, and let them know the man seemed slightly agitated and might need some help. As I was leaving I heard him arguing with the pharmacy technician, saying “But she’s NOT VERONICA!”)

Honesty Is Always The Best Medicine
ENGLAND, PHARMACY, UK | HEALTHY | DECEMBER 14, 2017
(I am waiting patiently for a prescription to be filled in a quiet pharmacy.)

Pharmacist: “Found it; here you go!”

Me: *takes bagged item* “Thanks.”

Pharmacist: “No problem, bye!”

Me: “Uhh… I still need to pay for this.”

Pharmacist: “Oh! I’m so sorry. Thank you for your honesty.” *rings up the transaction*

Me: “Well, not that I would anyway, but it would be kind of stupid for me to run off, seeing as you know exactly who I am and where I live.” *gestures to my address printed on the bag*

Pharmacist: “You wouldn’t believe what some people try.”

Unfiltered Story #101515
NORTH CAROLINA, PHARMACY, USA | UNFILTERED | DECEMBER 8, 2017
(I work at a pharmacy. It’s just me and two other people today, so I am in charge of customer initial contact.)

Me: *standing at the computer, hears heavy breathing come my way from the other side of the store*

Customer: *leans in the counter exhausted and breathing heavy* “Hey, hold on let me rest right quick.” *breathing heavy and sweating and smells like wet dog*

Me: “Okay.”

Customer: “Can I get my pain pills filled?”

Me: “Yeah, I can get it filled.”

(My manager immediately comes over.)

Manager: “Ma’am, you’re not allowed in this store. I watched you stealing just last week.”

Customer: *appalled* “It wasn’t me, it was my daughter. She looks exactly like me with her hair tied up.”

Manager: “Ma’am, I watched YOU steal it. Your daughter came to you to ask to take it and you put it in your purse.”

Customer: “I’m going to kick her a**! The same thing happened to me at the other store; it is always happening to me.”

(She walks out cursing while all three of us are watching her leave to make sure she doesn’t go off.)

Me: “If you keep getting caught, stop stealing. Easy fix.”

Manager: “She is an a** anyway.”

Acting Narcotic Robotic
NORTH CAROLINA, PHARMACY, USA | HEALTHY | DECEMBER 5, 2017
(I have an invisible chronic illness, Chronic Pancreatitis, that was caused by complications from gallbladder surgery a few years back. I am on tons of medication on a daily basis just so I can function normally and work a demanding full-time job. One of these medications is a narcotic; because of the multitudes who abuse it, a lot of judgement is passed on those who legitimately need it.)

Me: “Hi there! Just need to get this filled.”

(I hand my prescription over to a pharmacist that I don’t recognize. These prescriptions are very specific for when you can fill them, and are dated accordingly. Everything on mine is legit, as I literally just left the doctor’s office.)

Pharmacist: *takes a long time to look at it, and keeps looking back up at me* “Are you sure it’s time to fill this again?”

Me: “Um… Well, yeah. I just picked that up from my doctor, and the fill date is listed. You can also check your system, because this is the only pharmacy I use.”

(The pharmacist gives me a weird look and says it’ll be ten minutes, so I go sit down to wait. A few minutes later I hear her on the phone, and I don’t really pay any attention until I hear her say my name. Turns out she is calling my doctor’s office to verify it, the whole time shooting nasty sideways looks at me. Okay, totally fine; I know they have to be careful and check these things, so I brush it off. A couple minutes later when I walk up to the counter to pick it up

Pharmacist: “You know, this stuff is really bad for you. You shouldn’t be taking this.”

Me: *stunned* “Well, it helps me stay upright so I can work. Haha.”

Pharmacist: “My sister was on this and it was horrible. I would have to tell her all the time about how bad it was and that she had to get off of it, and she was addicted. It was really bad and she had such a hard time. You shouldn’t be taking this!”

Me: “Well, I’m going to let my doctor decide that. Can I check out now, please?”

(I understand how many people get hooked on narcotics, and the rising epidemic in this country, but they do have benefits that people like myself need. I don’t even think this lady was worried about the bigger social issue; I think she just got it into her head that it was a horrible medication from her bad experience with her sister. I’m sorry, lady; you are a pharmacist who should know better, and until you gain your medical doctorate and start practicing gastroenterology, keep your opinions about my treatment to yourself!)

Cancer Is A Crime
CALIFORNIA, PHARMACY, USA | HEALTHY | NOVEMBER 28, 2017
(I’ve been diagnosed with cancer and am on numerous medications, including morphine and oxycodone for the pain I am in. I’m pretty skinny and pale and not looking healthy after six months of chemotherapy. I go to my normal pharmacy with my paper prescription to get filled and a new pharmacy tech, or at least one I’ve never seen in the six months I’ve frequented this place, greets me. I hand him my paperwork, and he starts to type in into his computer, and then looks at me and says

Pharmacy Tech: “I see you’ve been getting these pills for a few months now, and you’re refilling them on the same date every month. You can’t fill this if you’re just going to sell them on the street for your drug money.”

(My jaw drops, and he hands my prescription back to me.)

Pharmacy Tech: “I’m calling the police now, sir, so don’t run off.”

(He then goes to the phone and starts dialing. The pharmacist sees me through their little window and waves at me, I see her a lot when I’m there and she’s helped consult me on the timing of taking my meds so I don’t make myself sick. I wave her over.)

Pharmacist: “Hi!”

Me: “You may want to talk to your new guy. He’s calling the cops on me.”

(She turns around and sees him on the phone.)

Pharmacist: “What are you doing?”

Pharmacy Tech: *covers the receiver* “This junkie is trying to get pills to sell. I’m calling the cops.”

(She rips the phone out of his hand and yells at him.)

Pharmacist: “He has cancer, you idiot!”

(He went pale. She sent him away and hung up the phone. I got my refills, and I never saw that guy again.)

Digger-ing Yourself Into A Hole
PHARMACY, USA | HEALTHY | NOVEMBER 28, 2017
(I am at the pharmacy to pick up a prescription that was called in.)

Tech: “Can I help you?”

Me: “I need to pick up for [Last Name].”

Tech: *types into computer* “First name?”

Me: “Digger.”

Tech: “Digger?”

Me: “Yes.”

(The tech give me a funny look and goes into the back. He returns with the medicine in hand.)

Tech: “So, you can’t drive while taking this. Also, you cannot drink alcohol while taking this. I will need you to sign saying you understand those restrictions.”

Me: *laughing* “No problem.”

Tech: “I need a date of birth.”

Me: “October 2015. I don’t know the day.”

Tech: “You don’t know your child’s birthdate?”

Me: “It’s not my child.”

Tech: “I’m not going to be able to fill this.”

Me: “I need the pharmacist. Now.”

(The pharmacist comes out and asks what the problem is.)

Tech: “She’s picking up this medicine but she doesn’t know the birthdate and then she says it isn’t her child.”

Pharmacist: *takes bag and reads label* “Look at this name.”

(The tech looks and still doesn’t seem to understand.)

Pharmacist: “The patient is named Digger K9 [Last Name]. That means it’s for her dog. Lots of people don’t know their dog’s birthday.”

Tech: “How was I supposed to know?”

Pharmacist: “I’ll finish this. Go wait in the office for me.”

(When I went to get his refill, the same tech handled the transaction. He commented that it was a really big dose for a toddler. Pretty sure whatever the pharmacist said — it didn’t help.)

Graduated Up To A Personalized Service
PENNSYLVANIA, PHARMACY, USA | HEALTHY | NOVEMBER 23, 2017
(I am picking up my medicine and in order to do so, you must give your name and birth date, including year.)

Clerk: “Name?”

Me: “[My Name].”

Clerk: “Birthday?”

Me: “[Date].”

Clerk: “That’s the same day I graduated. To the day.”

Me: “And year. Next time you ask, I’m just going to say, ‘the exact day you graduated.’”