It’s An Emergency! But It Can Wait. JERK, MEDICAL OFFICE, NURSES, USA | HEALTHY | SEPTEMBER 7, 2020

He Has A Very Descriptive Past
AUSTRALIA, BAD BEHAVIOR, EMPLOYEES, NEW SOUTH WALES, PHARMACY, SYDNEY | WORKING | OCTOBER 14, 2019
(My dad is regaling me with stories on a drive. As we go past a chemist

Dad: “That was the chemist that used to provide your grandfather with the drugs that kept him alive for ten extra years. The main pharmacist sold the place to someone else and when the new people opened up the computer records they found all sorts of horrible comments attached to people’s files: ‘Ugly, old b****,’ ‘Impotent pin-d**k,’ ‘Nice tits on her,’ etc.”

(Fast forward ten years and I am handing in a prescription at a chemist on the other side of the city. The pharmacist looks at my name on the script and says

Pharmacist: “Oh, [My Uncommon Surname]! Did you have a grandfather that lived in [Town of the first chemist]?”

Me: “Yes, I did.”

Pharmacist: “I used to own the chemist there and saw your grandfather often. I sold that place and moved here about ten years ago.”

Me: “Oh, really, how about that…” *smiles and nods, pulls my cardigan closed, backs slowly out of the place, and makes a mental note not to go back there*

Unfiltered Story #169589
PHARMACY, USA | UNFILTERED | OCTOBER 13, 2019
A vaguely semi-regular patient without insurance filled a few prescriptions, picked them up, etc. This is a rough approximation of the call I later received from the patient’s spouse, edited to maintain patient privacy.
Caller: My spouse, xxx, filled medicine xxx at your pharmacy. You do price matches, right?
Me: Sir/Ma’am, your spouse already picked up the medicine earlier in the day. Price matches are something that are done when filling the medicine, not after the fact.
Caller: But I called [competitor] beforehand, and their price was xxx, that’s xxx less! I told them to tell you to price match! (Clearly, the spouse didn’t listen, because the words “price match” had never crossed their lips. Also, I find it very presumptuous that they said to tell me to price match without even knowing whether we do so in he first place, as opposed to saying to ask me to call the competitor for a price match.)
Me: They did not mention price matching at any point during the filling, and as I said before, I cannot retroactively price match. It isn’t even possible in my computer system.
Caller: But that’s a lot of money, and we’re regulars and fill things at your pharmacy all the time! They only picked it up like five minutes ago! (It was about 25% less. Also, I’d made the prices extremely clear at the time of drop off, providing ample opportunity for the prescription to be taken elsewhere or a price match to be asked for. And to top it off, the prescription had actually been picked up almost an hour before.)
Me: Unfortunately, there isn’t any way for me to price match something that is already picked up, it’s not physically possible in the system in the first place.
Caller: …
After about fifteen seconds of silence from the other end of the line during which I asked multiple times if the caller was still there, the line disconnected abruptly.

Finally Registers The Reason Why
AT THE CHECKOUT, CALIFORNIA, HEALTH & BODY, PHARMACY, RUDE & RISQUE, SAN DIEGO, USA | RIGHT | OCTOBER 7, 2019
(I am stocking shelves at a pharmacy. An elderly gentleman, at least in his 70s, walks up to me and looks at my nametag.)

Customer: “Mister [My Name], yes, I was wondering if you could open up a register for me?”

(I look at the cashier stands. Two are operating, and the lines are not busy at all.)

Me: “The wait shouldn’t be very long. Is there a problem?”

Customer: “I really just need you to open a register for me, please.”

Me: *very confused* “I assure you, the ladies running the registers right now are competent and will have you out the door in no time.”

Customer: “That’s just it. They are ladies…”

(He turns to me and exposes the large box of condoms he has secreted in his jacket.)

Customer: “I wouldn’t be so brazen!”

Me: “Right this way, sir.”

Lunch Is Dangerous To Your Health
ARKANSAS, CRAZY REQUESTS, JERK, PHARMACY, USA | RIGHT | SEPTEMBER 25, 2019
(At my pharmacy, we have only one pharmacist on the weekends. Because of that, we have to close for a half-hour on the weekends due to labor laws so that our pharmacist can get a lunch. We close at the same time every weekend to avoid confusion with regular customers. At exactly two minutes to lunch, a man comes rushing up to the pharmacy.)

Husband: “I just got out of the emergency room. My doctor told me I need all of these right away, especially the pain medication.”

(He proceeds to hand me about five new prescriptions.)

Me: “I apologize, sir, we are about to close for our scheduled lunch, but we would be happy to fill it for you in thirty minutes when we get back.”

Husband: “I can’t wait! We’re traveling to Texas and I need my medicine!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but if we don’t leave right now, our systems will shut us out. We are required to take a lunch at this time.”

(He takes his prescriptions and stomps away. As we are getting ready to close everything up, his wife comes over.)

Irate Wife: “Why won’t you fill his medication?!”

Me: “Ma’am, we will be happy to fill his prescription as soon as we get back from lunch.”

Irate Wife: “This is ridiculous. Where else am I supposed to get this medication?”

(The pharmacist decides to step in.)

Pharmacist: “Ma’am, we have to close for lunch now, but we’ll be back in thirty minutes and will be happy to fill your husband’s prescriptions then.”

Irate Wife: “We’re travelling; we don’t have time to wait!”

Pharmacist: “If I may ask, where are you travelling to?”

Irate Wife: “We’re on our way to Texas.”

Pharmacist: “If you don’t want to wait here for the medicine, there is another pharmacy in our chain on your route. By the time you get there, they will be back from their lunch and be able to fill your medicine.”

Irate Wife: “This is ridiculous! I want all of your names; I’m reporting you to home office!”

(Our pharmacist calmly gives her our names and the woman leaves with her husband.)

Fellow Pharmacy Technician: “So, she’s reporting us for… following the law?”

Me: “Yes. Yes, she is.”

Will Need A Sedative For The Husband
ARKANSAS, IGNORING & INATTENTIVE, JERK, PATIENTS, PHARMACY, USA | RIGHT | SEPTEMBER 25, 2019
(I work as a pharmacy technician. On the weekends, we don’t get drug shipments, which can lead to some… interesting situations.)

Customer: “I need to get this prescription filled. It’s for my wife; she’s at home waiting for it.”

Me: “Certainly, sir, just let me put it into our system.”

(I proceed to enter the patient’s information into our computer.)

Me: “All right, sir, it will be about fifteen minutes.”

Customer: “I’ll just wait right here. She needs it tonight.”

(As we are beginning to fill the prescription, we realize we have none of the medication he needs. The pharmacist calls him over.)

Pharmacist: “Sir, I’m sorry, but we don’t have any of this medicine here. We can order it today and it will be here Monday.”

Customer: “I don’t have time to wait; she needs it tonight!”

Pharmacist: “Well, I can call another pharmacy to see if they have any.”

Customer: “You do that!”

(The pharmacist calls the other store. They have two of the pills, which should be enough to get the man’s wife through the weekend.)

Pharmacist: “Sir, the pharmacy in [Town about thirty minutes away] has enough of this drug to get her through the weekend. Would you like to transfer this prescription there?”

Customer: “No, I don’t want to drive that far!”

Pharmacist: “Well, I can call the doctor to see about getting it changed to something we do have.”

Customer: “Fine, call them now! Hurry up. She needs this d*** medicine tonight!”

(The pharmacist calls the doctor. He refuses to change the medicine. The pharmacist explains that the customer is insisting that they need the medication tonight. The doctor informs us that she can wait to start the treatment on Monday without any problems.)

Pharmacist: “Okay, sir, I called the doctor and he wouldn’t change it, but he said it would be fine for your wife to wait until Monday to begin the treatment.”

Customer: “She needs the medicine tonight! I don’t understand why you won’t just give me the d*** pills!”

Pharmacist: “Sir, we don’t have a single one of those pills to give you.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous. They had them at the hospital. Why can’t one of you just go to the hospital and get some more of them?! She needs them!”

Pharmacist: “I’m sorry, it’s not legal for us to do that. Your doctor said your wife will be fine until Monday.”

Customer: “Why won’t you just fill my d*** prescription?”

Pharmacist: “Because, sir, we don’t have any of the pills.”

Customer: “This is bulls***. If anything happens to her, it’s your fault!”

(The customer left, angry. He was back on Monday to pick up his wife’s prescription. And guess what? She was fine.)

Calm At The Sight Of Mayhem
GROCERY STORE, JERK, PHARMACY, USA, VIRGINIA | RIGHT | SEPTEMBER 25, 2019
(I go to a store to get some photos printed for my job, one of which is a photo of my cat. As I go to ask for my photos, an older cashier who isn’t actually specialized in photos comes to help me. Before I get to see my photos and pay, I hear a woman yelling.)

Woman: “What do you mean, you won’t take it?! I can’t stay here anymore! I’m about to leave!”

(She walks over to the cashier who is in the middle of helping me. I stand back, a little afraid of what she might do.)

Woman: “Hey, you! I need your help! She says it won’t take this coupon!”

Cashier: “Well, miss, you actually have the wrong items.”

(The woman points to her coupon and back to her products.)

Woman: “No, see, look here. That’s [product], right? And this says, ‘[product].’”

Cashier: “Well, miss, nothing’s coming up. I’m sorry.”

Woman: “Well, then, your system is broken. I swear, every time! Look…”

(The woman is obviously upset, and she isn’t shy. This exchange continues for almost half an hour before she hands him her credit card and wanders off to find some chips to buy. At this point, I carefully go to get my photos to look at. But before I can purchase them, the woman is called back to the counter.)

Cashier: “Susan! Susan! Are you ready to check out?”

Woman: *still very frustrated* “Susan? My name’s Vicky! Ha, why are you calling me Susan? But that’s supposed to be on sale! I wouldn’t come here if I had to get things without these coupons!”

(She turns to me, and her demeanor changes drastically. She smiles at my picture of my cat.)

Woman: “Oh, is that your kitty? What’s her name?”

Me: *smiling nervously* “Mayhem.”

Woman: “Wow, Mayhem? She’s cute.” *to cashier* “These coupons should work!”

(Finally, she’s rung up, and she leaves the store.)

Me: “Does she come here a lot?”

Cashier: “Oh, yeah, everyone knows Susan. Give her a few hours; she’ll be back.”

Unfiltered Story #167681
AUSTRALIA, PHARMACY | UNFILTERED | SEPTEMBER 25, 2019
I am the customer in this story. My friends and I are divers – we use a compressor in the boat and dive with lines to breathe through. The compressor has filters that work best stuffed with feminine hygiene pads and honey (it catches all dust and adds a pleasant taste to the air). Also to put on a wetsuit it helps to have something slippery on your legs (pantyhose works great)

Heading out of town for weekend dive trip my friends and I stop at a country town and walk into a pharmacy. We spend some time checking out the pantyhose display looking for some that would fit us. We are three rather big guys. Not being regular buyers it takes awhile. Having made our choice we approach the assistant at the counter, while making our purchases one of my friends says me “Have you changed the filters lately?” Remembering that I have not I ask the assistant for a package of feminine hygiene pads. We get a very strange look, not helped when my other friend asks “By the way do you have any honey?”

Who Put Sand(paper) Up Their Crotches?
BAD BEHAVIOR, DALLAS, PHARMACY, TEXAS, USA, WORDPLAY | RIGHT | SEPTEMBER 23, 2019
(I am at a pharmacy at 3:00 am trying to pick up some toilet paper. There are two people arguing somewhere near the rear of the store and the store clerk is falling asleep at the checkout. It is when I get to the toilet paper section that I discover that the people arguing are standing in front of my goal. Not wanting to get anywhere near this nasty-sounding fight, I go down a few aisles to wait out the storm. That’s when I hear this gem

Lady: “We ain’t buying that s***ty a** s***!”

Guy: “That crap you always buy always gets all up in my a**. We be buying a** wipes, not f****** tissue paper!”

Lady: “I’m not rubbing my crotch with this sandpaper bulls***!”

Guy: “This ain’t nothing like sandpaper. This s*** be tight and it ain’t gonna rub ya raw!”

(I’m an aisle over at this point trying not to laugh too loudly. They’re making sailors proud with their foul language. I’ve never heard such a colorful argument about toilet paper before. They continue this for a bit when the guy drops some math on the lady.)

Guy: “Look right here. This has 200 sheets per f****** roll. There be four rolls in this s***. With five sheets for every hardcore a**-wiping and four hardcore a**-wipings for each s***, this f****** roll gonna last for ten hardcore s*** sessions. That’s f****** forty hardcore s***s for five f****** dollars. And your b****-a** s*** costs f****** ten bucks and I gotta dig the f****** s*** nuggets out of my a** every time I use this s***.”

(They must have heard me laughing at this point as they got really quiet. I don’t know if the guy ever convinced the lady to buy whatever it was. Definitely spiced up my earlier morning.)

You Can’t Insure Against Evil
BAD BEHAVIOR, PARENTS/GUARDIANS, PENNSYLVANIA, PHARMACY, USA | HEALTHY | SEPTEMBER 22, 2019
(A young woman pulls up to the drive-thru pharmacy to pick up Ritalin for her son, who is sitting in the backseat. The medication isn’t ready so I check the system and see that the insurance isn’t covering it. A reason is usually provided, but not in this case.)

Evil Mom: “That makes no sense. We always get it filled here and there’s never a problem. The insurance covers everything.” *classic line with pharmacy customers who think insurance is magic and has no limitations*

Me: “I understand. But I just tried to run it through the insurance and they rejected it without giving a reason why. Would you be able to call them?”

Evil Mom: “Okay, I’ll call right now.” *looks at her insurance cards angrily* “So, what’s the number?”

Me: *confused why she thinks I know the number off the top of my head* “There should be a customer service number on the back of the card.”

Evil Mom: *still angry* “Member services?”

Me: “Yes.”

(She calls and remains sitting in the single-lane driveway, blocking a line of cars with no regard for the other people who came for their medications.)

Me: “Could you pull around the store to make the call?”

Evil Mom: “I’m not leaving this spot until I get my son’s meds.”

(The pharmacist comes over.)

Pharmacist: *friendly* “I’m sorry, but would you be able to—”

Evil Mom: *without looking at us* “I’m not leaving.” *rolls the window up in our faces*

(The pharmacist curses under her breath and leaves to help other customers. The mom reaches someone from the insurance company and puts the window back down. For fifteen minutes, I listen to her scream at the representative. The whole store can hear her through the drive-thru dropping profuse F-bombs and bullying the rep. Her son is fidgeting in the back seat, but sadly, he doesn’t look surprised by this behavior.)

Evil Mom: “Why isn’t my son’s medication covered? You are supposed to cover it and he needs this! What is your name? Okay. And what is your last name? ‘L’ is your last name? Wow. That’s a weird last name. Then give me your employee number. What do you mean, you don’t have numbers? So, how does your company have you on file? Give me your information. You know what? Nevermind. I want to speak to a manager. Now.”

(A car behind her honks.)

Other Customer: *shouting forward* “What’s going on? It’s been almost half an hour! Just go inside!”

Evil Mom: *shouting back* “SHUT THE F*** UP!”

(Eventually, the cars behind her begin leaving the line. None of them come inside the store. Mom, still on the phone, throws a discount prescription card and her welfare card at me and looks expectant. I return a blank look.)

Evil Mom: *pleasant voice* “I’m waiting for you.”

Me: *confused as to what she expects me to do, since the insurance issue has not been resolved* “Did they put the claim through? If so, I can try to re-run it.”

Evil Mom: *arrogantly* “Just run the cards and give me the medication. I’m going to pay the same amount as I did last time. Use the cards I just gave you and give me his pills.”

Me: “It still has to go through the insurance first.”

(The mom continues screaming obscenities simultaneously at the phone and now at me. The pharmacist comes over again and takes charge of the situation.)

Pharmacist: “You need to stop talking like that to our staff. You’re cursing and insulting us. We don’t need that. In the future, I think you need to use a different pharmacy.”

Evil Mom: *in a weirdly amused way* “Who are you even? I didn’t ask you anything.”

(The pharmacist and I are fed up. I look back and see that the store manager has been listening to everything in the background. The pharmacist tries to run the medication through the insurance again but the rejection is still coming up.)

Pharmacist: “The insurance is still not going through. We’ve done what we can. The cash price is $130 and we can fill it for you.”

(The mom sped away in a flash without another word. We were surprised she didn’t curse us out one more time. We anticipate that she has already called corporate to tell them we are horrible people preventing her from getting her son’s medication. The store manager who overheard said she will vouch for us. If that evil mom knew how to be patient and work with people, there is a chance she could have gotten her son’s medication filled. I feel really bad for that kid.)

Unfiltered Story #163255
PHARMACY, USA | UNFILTERED | SEPTEMBER 16, 2019
(Please note that any and all patient-specific information has been completely redacted from this story, so that the edited anecdote below is entirely HIPAA-compliant.) The pharmacy I work at is located inside a grocery store, and we can ring out items from the main store also, but only about as many as an express line can take (not a whole cart full). We also do not have a scale in the pharmacy, so we can only ring out produce that is pre-bagged with a bar code or is sold by quantity and not by weight. I was working alone shortly before closing on a weekend, when somebody came by to pick up medicine for their spouse. One of the prescriptions was a brand name medicine with a high copay. The person whined about the cost (which was set by the insurance company, not the pharmacy) briefly, then asked me to ring out their grocery items because they only had one check with them and no credit card. They had an overflowing cart with well over a hundred dollars of merchandise, which included at least three items I could immediately see that have to be weighed. I informed the person that I cannot do that, but the cashiers for the main store can scan the grocery items, print a slip for them to bring back to the pharmacy, and then they could pay for both the cart of food and the medicines on one check (this is not the first time something like this has happened, and usually isn’t that big of a deal). I also politely asked the person to please take care of this immediately, because the pharmacy was supposed to be closing in about ten minutes. Fast forward to at least fifteen minutes later. The person is back, and sits down on the bench in front of the pharmacy to proceed to hunt through their pockets and bag for their check. Five or ten minutes later they give up, and inform me that they are going to pay with cash (why they didn’t do that in the first place I will never know). Eventually, they pull out exactly the amount of cash except for the change portion, and seem confused when I inform them that I need an additional $0.xx. In the end, I give up on them finding enough change and raid the take-a-penny-leave-a-penny (which thankfully happened to have a dime and a nickel in it in addition to the pennies, for some unfathomable reason) for the last few cents so I can go home.

Unfiltered Story #162040
CHARLESTON, ILLINOIS, PHARMACY, USA | UNFILTERED | SEPTEMBER 5, 2019
(I’m the customer in this story, sadly enough. I’m a student at a state college and I have to walk seven-ish blocks to a big-chain drugstore in town to get my prescriptions filled, as two of them can’t be filled at the school pharmacy. On the way to the pharmacy at the back, I stop and grab a drink.

Me: “Hi! I have a prescription to fill, and I’d also like to pay for this before I forget.” (I hand the pharmacist my drink, which I’ve finished half of.)

Pharmacist: “Fine by me! That’ll be [total].”

(It’s only when I reach into my purse that I realize it’s quite a bit lighter than it usually is.)

Me: “Oh, ****.”

(I dig around for several minutes, trying to find some loose change, but I come up empty-handed.)

Me: “****, I left my wallet in my dorm… I am SO sorry!”

(The only person in line behind me reaches into his pocket.)

Other Customer: “How much is it?”

Pharmacist: “No need, sir. I’ll get my manager, see what we can do.”

(She calls up her manager.)

Manager: “I’ll cover the cost. I could technically have you arrested for theft, but I’m going to be nice and let you off easy. Don’t consume anything until you know you can pay for it from now on, okay?”

Me: “Thank you so much!”

(I sit down and wait for my prescription to be filled. Eventually the pharmacist emerges instead of calling my name.)

Pharmacist: “Okay, your prescription is ready…but it’s [cost].”

(My heart sinks, but I smile.)

Me: “That’s all right. Can you hold it for me? It may take me about [time] to get back.”

Pharmacist: “Of course.”

(I walk the seven or so blocks to my dorm and back, now with my wallet. Thirsty again, I grab another drink but make a point of not opening it.)

Me: “Hi, I have a prescription ready to pick up under [My Name], and could you ring this up twice, please?”

(The manager tried to insist that he’d cover the cost, but I was more than happy to buy two drinks for the cost of a drink and a half.)

Unfiltered Story #160170
MINNESOTA, PHARMACY, USA | UNFILTERED | AUGUST 20, 2019
( I work in a pharmacy as a technician.)

Co-worker: *slams phone on holder* ….. How long was I on the phone?

Me: 15 minutes.

Co-worker: I just spent 15 minutes convincing a woman not to put a tampon into her urethra. I don’t know who told her that it was a good idea to put a tampon into her urethra. *shakes her head while I’m curled over the counter laughing* She even asked me THREE times!

*Two hours later*
Co-worker: You remember the person I was on the phone with a few hours ago?

Me: The tampon lady?

Co-worker: Yea, I found what she was talking about. I was walking through one of the isles and this was on the floor so I was going to throw it away but I looked at it. *she shows me the leaflet and I start laughing again*

Me: But this goes into the vagina! Not the urethra! It’s… just really wide at the base…. but does it even support it?

Co-worker: *snorts* No. And I still wouldn’t recommend it to anyone to use.

Unfiltered Story #160120
MINNESOTA, PHARMACY, USA | UNFILTERED | AUGUST 15, 2019
( I’m a in-training pharmacy technician in Walgreens and today was one of our busier days of the week.)

Me: Welcome to Walgreens! Are you picking up today?

Customer: Yes

Me: Can I have your last name?

Customer: It’s (XXXXXXX).

Me: And your first name?

Customer: (XXXXXX)

Me: Alright, Looks like I have two ready for you. Give me a few seconds to grab that.
*I ran around the back of the shelf were we keep are prescriptions and start looking for his name. I found his two prescriptions, which were diapers, and one of them had a note written on it. “Does he want both? See Pharmacist.” After reading, I go to the pharmacist. *
Me: This patient is here to pick these up. *Holds up both bags of diapers*

Pharmacist: *she looks at them* We receive two scripts from his doctor for both. Ask him for which he wants or if he wants both.

Me: Okay. *goes back to the front* So it looks like we received two scripts from your doctor for two brands of diapers. There’s [ Brand 1], which we have 17 of for you, and [brand 2] which is a completion because you picked up 47 earlier.

Customer: Oh I can get both? Great. And I talked to my insurance and they said that they will cover 150 of the diapers every month, so can I get 150 of [brand 1] and 150 of [brand 2] ?

Me: Umm Let me ask my pharmacist that. *runs to the back to tell her what’s going on before she tells me that we can’t do that because they look at Diapers, not by individual brand. I turn back to tell the customer what the pharmacist told me.* So it looks like we can’t do that because your insurance looks at the total diapers and not by individual brands. So by the insurance’s records, you’ve already picked up 150 diapers, including the two I’m hold in my hands.

Customer: No. I didn’t pick up 150. And these two are not the same so they can’t be counted together. *points to brand 1* It’s like these are apples and those *points to brand 2* are oranges. They aren’t the same. You’d think in this time of the world, with out technologically advanced we are, all the answers we want are just a few types away. Then we won’t have to deal with all this brain damage.

Me: …. *nods a long* Umm.. Let me see if my pharmacist knows of an override code that could help us. *Turns to the pharmacist for help because There is NOTHING that I can do, legally.* I need your help…. he’s still going on and on.

Pharmacist: *she walks out* Hi. What seems to be the problem here?

Customer: She’s telling me that I’ve already picked up 150 diapers already.

Pharmacist: Yes that is right, that is what we have on file. *she pulls up his profile on the computer* It looks like you picked up a partial fill last week, 47 of [brand 2]. And with the 17 of [brand 1] and the 84 of [brand 2], that makes up the 150 of this month.

Customer: No. I never picked up any last week.

Pharmacist: If you want, I can call the manager to check the cameras to see who picked it up for you last week.

Customer: No, just give me the 150 of the [brand 1].

Pharmacist: I can’t do that because you’ve already picked up 47 of [brand 2] and you have to complete the doctor’s prescription of 131 diapers of [brand 2].

Customer: *he sighs* But they aren’t the same! You don’t understand! *he points to brand 1* This is like a man that has a penis! And *points to brand 2* this is like a woman that has a vagina! Now. They are NOT the same! Can’t you get the manager or someone that knows what they’re doing to solve this. We are in a technology advanced world! Shouldn’t everything be just a few clicks away on the computer and then we wouldn’t have to suffer brain damage from all of this?!

Pharmacist: …. *A small… awkward pause because she was just absorbing what he said, being that she is the Pharmacy manager….* If you want, I can give your insurance a call to see if they can revert it but again, it will only be able to work starting next month. I can also leave a note in your chart saying to only use [brand 1] as well but this will only be able to go into effect next month when the insurance will start paying for 150.

Customer: *he sighs* Fine, give them a call and call me when you find an answer. But [brand 1] and [brand 2] ARE NOT THE SAME. *he leaves*

Pharmacist: *she just smiles* Have a good day, sir. *she walks quickly back to work area, shaking her head* Anyone up for burgers? My treat.

** Brand 1 and Brand 2 are both diapers, but under two different brands. Example, Huggies and Pampers are both diapers but under different brands.

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Wasn’t A Hard Decision
HEALTH & BODY, NON-DIALOGUE, PENNSYLVANIA, PHARMACY, USA | RIGHT | AUGUST 12, 2019
I was working at the drive-thru window at the pharmacy. A customer pulled up and I asked for his name and date of birth. After he replied, I went to get his prescription out of the waiting bin. I informed him that his insurance did not cover this medication; most insurances do not because it is for erectile dysfunction.

He asked me for the cash price and I told him it was roughly 120 dollars for four pills.

He looked at his wife who was in the passenger seat, looked at me, said, “F*** that. I don’t need a hard-on that bad,” and sped away.

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Be Careful Where You Insert That Battery
AUSTRIA, PHARMACY, STUPID, VIENNA | RIGHT | JULY 31, 2019
Customer: “I need a medical thermometer.”

Me: “A digital one that’s battery-operated or a glass one without a battery?”

Customer: “I don’t know.”

(Since a digital one gives results faster, I grab one and hand it to the customer.)

Customer: “Oh, no, I’ve got one of these at home, but it has no battery, and it’s not working!”

Me: “These run all on battery. Maybe the battery in yours is empty.”

Customer: *thinking hard for a minute* “Maybe that’s why it’s not working anymore.”

Me: *internal facepalm*

Give A Dog A Bone
MICHIGAN, PETS & ANIMALS, PHARMACY, RETAIL, RUDE & RISQUE, USA | HEALTHY | JULY 11, 2019
(One day at work, I hear my pharmacist and another technician talking about an unusual prescription that’s come in. Curious, I switch to a computer nearby and find them discussing a dog who’s been prescribed the generic for Viagra. Apparently, a recent study has indicated that it may be helpful for relieving coughing in dogs, for some reason, and we spend some time discussing how it might work in that regard. Later, as I’m working on the computer and she’s filling prescriptions behind me, she glances up and leans toward me, chuckling.)

Pharmacist: “You know, it’s hard enough for a person to talk to their doctor about this type of medication. I’d think it’d have to be even harder for a dog!”

Me: *playing along* “Well, yeah. Besides not being able to talk, it’s gotta be way more embarrassing for them, with everything all hanging out and no way to disguise it.”

(After a few moments.)

Me: “I can totally see the commercials, though. This gorgeous Golden Retriever stud going ‘Once, I was the laughing stock of the breeding kennel. But now, I’m back to being top dog, thanks to Viagra!’”

Pharmacist: *cracking up* “See, none of the other health care professions get to enjoy jokes like this.”

(I love my coworkers.)

Unfiltered Story #155148
PENNSYLVANIA, PHARMACY, USA | UNFILTERED | JUNE 23, 2019
This happens all the time.

*customer walks up *

Me: Hello!

Customer: Hi, I need to pick up, my doctor called something in earlier.

Me: OK, what’s your name?

Customer: Dr. Blank called it in.

Me: What’s your-

Customer: I think it was for lispil *they usually mean lisinopril, pronounced like it looks*

Me: What’s-

Customer: It was about 2 hours ago, can’t you find it?

Me: *firm voice* What is your NAME?

Customer: Oh! Jane.

Me: And your last name? *medications are sorted by last name*

Customer: *last name*

Me: *finds medication and rings them out*

Honestly, it’s like pulling teeth.

Unfiltered Story #152444
CANADA, PHARMACY, SASKATCHEWAN | UNFILTERED | MAY 29, 2019
I worked at a pharmacy that was surrounded but seniors homes, so this made up the majority of our clientele, the pharmacy was in a mall which included a grocery store, when the grocery store was closed for Reno’s we brought in some basic staples like milk and bread and continued carrying them after the grocery store re-opened. our suplly was limited we carried only small CARTONS of milk, no jugs.

customerwith a jug of milk) I want to return this, its passed the expiry date, and I lost the receipt.

me: Ma’am you didn’t purchase this from us, so I cannot process a return

customer: excuse me?! I KNOW where I purchased my milk from, I got from here and you need to return it for me!

me: we do not carry jugs of milk ma’am, only cartons, so you cannot possibly have purchased it from us, perhaps you got it from the grocery store down the hall?

(note I look a lot younger then I am, it is very likely the customer presumed I was in school and only worked part time)
Customer: I bought it from from here, you just must not have been here when the jugs came in.

me: Ma’am we are only open 9 hours a day Monday to Sat and 4 hours on Sundays and I work 8 of those hours Mon-Sat and all of them on Sundays. I place and accept all the orders, I am telling you, we have never had jugged milk in stock, you did not purchase this from us.

Customer:….. oh..sorry *hangs her head and leaves*:

Obama Drama, Part 7
BIZARRE, JERK, LOUISIANA, PHARMACY, USA | RIGHT | MAY 21, 2019
(It is during the Obama presidency. The pharmacy phone rings.)

Caller: “I want to check and see if my prescription is ready.”

Me: “Sure. Could I get your information?”

(I look up the patient and see that his insurance wants additional paperwork from the doctor before they will pay for the medication. This is a VERY common problem, especially for expensive or name-brand medication.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but it looks like your prescription isn’t ready because we are still waiting for the doctor to file some additional paperwork with the insurance company.”

Caller: “What do you mean? I was told that my prescription would be ready by five! Why isn’t it ready?”

Me: “Sir, this medication is name-brand and very expensive. Your insurance company doesn’t want to pay for it unless your doctor provides additional paperwork stating that it is medically necessary.”

Caller: “Well, of course it’s medically necessary! My doctor wrote it for me, so I need it! This is ridiculous. I need my medicine!”

Me: “I apologize for that, sir. If you’d like to pay the cash price of [several hundred dollars], I can have your prescription ready in about ten minutes. But unfortunately, if you want your insurance to cover it, you may want to try calling your doctor and making sure he’s filled out the paperwork we faxed to him.”

Caller: “This has nothing to do with my insurance company! You know what this is? This is that ‘Obama-Care’ and his death panels! He’s just trying to kill off all of us old people! I don’t know how he even got in office; he’s a Kenyan!”

(The caller continues spouting out conspiracy theories for another five minutes.)

Caller: “Well, I think I’ve wasted enough of your time. Goodnight.” *click*

Me: “…”

Obama Drama, Part 6
BIZARRE, EMPLOYEES, MASSACHUSETTS, POLITICS, RETAIL, USA | WORKING | JANUARY 31, 2019
(I work in a major retail chain. One night, we get an unusual truck delivery. Our manager is waiting by the dock with us as we get ready to unload it.)

Manager: *sigh* “All right, everyone. This is going to seem crazy, but I’ve confirmed with the home office that the delivery inside is definitely intended to be ours just the way it is, so just go with it.”

Coworker: “Wait. What the heck is inside?”

Manager: “You’ll see.”

(Shortly after, the truck driver opens the door to reveal an absolutely absurd amount of tangerines. My coworkers and I alternate between staring at the tangerines in amazement and each other in shock and confusion.)

Coworker: “There’s no way this is right. I get that we’re a busy supercenter and all, but there’s no way even we can sell all these oranges before a whole bunch goes bad.”

Manager: “Yep, that’s how I feel, but apparently someone higher up than me disagrees.”

Me: *as I’m sliding my pallet jack under the first pallet* “What reason could there possibly be to make this seem like a good idea?”

Driver: “You want to know what these oranges are for? This is all about that Obamacare!”

(Suddenly, everyone stops what they’re doing to process what the driver has said.)

Manager: “What… What does that have to do with oranges? No, actually, what does that have to do with anything right now?”

Driver: “That’s Obamacare for you; it doesn’t make any sense!”

(We quickly gave up trying to figure out what the driver was talking about. For the next week, all our nightly meetings included a manager urging us all to get a bag of tangerines on the way home. Once the story of the delivery had spread, we would all say goodbye to each other with, “Don’t forget your Obamacare oranges!”)

Obama Drama, Part 5
AT THE CHECKOUT, JERK, RETAIL, TENNESSEE, USA | RIGHT | JULY 8, 2018
(At the store where I work, it is policy to card for ALL tobacco and alcohol purchases. It doesn’t matter if the person has grey hair and more wrinkles than a Shar Pei; we still have to card them. Failure to card can lose me my job and cost me and the store a hefty fine. The customer I am serving here appears to be in at least his 60s.)

Customer: “I’ll take a can of [chewing tobacco], please.”

Me: “Certainly.” *unlocks the tobacco cabinet and gets out the can* “May I see your ID, please?”

Customer: “You’re kidding me!”

Customer’s Buddy: “The state of things now! Is this an Obama rule? This is ridiculous how things are nowadays! Is his one of Obama’s rules?”

Me: “No, it is a store rule.”

Customer & His Buddy: *laughs* “A store rule?!”

(The customer handed me his ID, I typed in the birthdate and told him his total, and he paid and left, both of them still laughing. This is not the first time a customer has railed about “Obama taking away their rights” when asked for ID.)

Obama Drama, Part 4
BIZARRE, JERK, MISSOURI, RETAIL, SILLY, USA | RIGHT | JANUARY 15, 2018
(I work at an office supply store in the printing department. It is a Saturday evening, and a coworker and I are currently putting out ads for the next week. We have just closed our doors, and everything is going fine until we get a call. I don’t pay much attention until my coworker calls me over to take it, as it is for my department. Keep in mind that we are currently closed.)

Me: “Thank you for holding. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I was wondering if I could get a price quote on some prints?”

Me: “Sure thing! What are you looking to get?”

(The customer proceeds to describe what he wants, which goes on for a few minutes. The conversation goes well, nothing out of the ordinary, until we reach the end of the conversation.)

Customer: “Sounds good! What time do you all close?”

Me: “We closed about 15 minutes ago, sir, but we open back up at 10:00 tomorrow morning.”

Customer: “Aw, man, really? I am actually just right outside. Could you make an exception?”

Me: “No, I’m afraid not, but like I said, we open back up tomorrow.”

Customer: “But I’m from out of town and I really need this done.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we are closed.”

Customer: “But I’m from Texas; does that change anything?”

Me: “Unfortunately not, sir. We are still closed, regardless.”

(We go back and forth like this for several minutes. He is getting irate the longer it goes on, and so am I. I try to keep the friendliest voice I can muster. It seems like he has finally decided to give up, until the customer says something I never expected.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. Like I said before, we are closed.”

Customer: *in a threatening tone* “Do I need to call Obama to confirm that you’re closed?”

Me: *legitimately speechless*

Customer: *click*

(After I hung up the phone, I told my coworker and manager. They both got a pretty good kick out of it! It was the strangest phone call I have ever received. We also never did get that phone call from Obama.)