We’re Not Toying With You Anymore

Boyfriend/Girlfriend, Jerk, Maine, Pet Store, Portland, USA | Romantic | September 22, 2017


(My boyfriend is the bad customer in this story. We’re picking up a few things for our dog at a pet store when he comes across an aisle of squeaky dog toys and gleefully begins “testing” each one, squeezing it once or twice before moving on to the next one.)

Me: “Do you have any idea how annoying you’re being?”

Boyfriend: “Hey, I just want to know what they all sound like so we can pick out the best one.” *continues squeezing the toys*

Me: “She doesn’t need any new toys, and anyway, they all sound the same. Don’t be rude to the people who work here.”

Boyfriend: “Whatever, they can probably just tune it out. They won’t mind.”

(I’m about to say something else, when an employee approaches with a forced-looking smile. Having worked retail myself, I know a “customer service” smile when I see one.)

Employee: “Do you guys need help finding anything?”

Me: “No, thanks; we’re just about done. Is he driving you all crazy?”

Employee: *still smiling* “I really can’t answer that honestly.”

(I turned back to my boyfriend with a smirk. He blushed, immediately let go of the toy he had been squeaking, and walked quickly towards the registers.)