Smearing Your Education
ALABAMA, DOCTOR/PHYSICIAN, JERK, MEDICAL OFFICE, USA | HEALTHY | SEPTEMBER 8, 2018
(At the age of 19 my mother decides it is time for me to get my first pap smear and checkup with a gynecologist. My appointment starts out normally; the nurse is very nice and explains what will happen, before leaving me alone to change into a gown. I settle myself on the table before the doctor comes in. He is an older man in his late 50s, rather heavy set, and with a bulbous nose.)
Ob/Gyn: “Good morning! So, what brings you in today?”
Me: “I recently turned 19, and my mother suggested it was time for me to get my first pap smear, since I am sexually active.”
Ob/Gyn: “Your mom is silly to worry about that. You really shouldn’t be here before you’re 23.”
Me: *remains silent as the doctor explains the procedure again*
Ob/Gyn: “So, are you a student? What are you studying?”
Me: *not wanting to explain my complex writing major* “Oh, I’m majoring in English.”
Ob/Gyn: “So, what are you going to do with that other than be unemployed?” *chuckles* “Serve burgers?”
(The rest of my appointment was spent in stony silence while the doctor began an already nerve-wracking and intimate procedure.)
|