Don’t Even Start With Me
LABORATORY, STUPID, SWITZERLAND, TECH SUPPORT | HEALTHY | JUNE 15, 2018
(I work in IT for a medical laboratory, and part of my job is to troubleshoot connections between medical devices and our software. The medical devices themselves are not ours to manage, however. I get this call one morning
Lab Tech: “Hi, my machine is not working. Could you help me, please?”
Me: “Sure! What device, and what seems to be wrong?”
Lab Tech: “It’s [Device], and I don’t know; it’s just doing nothing.”
Me: “Okay, let me check.”
(I see nothing wrong with my monitoring. However, our connectors have a tendency to need regular reboots, as they’re quite old and tend to give us trouble, so I’m expecting it to be something wrong with our equipment.)
Me: “Can you please reboot the connector? The one behind your machine.”
Lab Tech: “Sure, give me a sec.”
(My monitoring starts showing its usual shutdown and boot-up messages.)
Me: “Okay, looks good. Can you try the device again?”
Lab Tech: “Nope, still nothing.”
(I try every trick in the book to get the device to work, including having her reboot the medical device itself, which is kind of a last solution, since they’re not ours to troubleshoot. Nothing ever seems wrong on my end, but the lab tech still says it’s not working. This goes on for FIVE HOURS! I’m way past desperation point, when I ask her to walk me through every step of her process to see where exactly it hangs.)
Lab Tech: “Well, I put my samples in the tray…” *pause*
Me: “Yes, and then?”
Lab Tech: “Well, that’s supposed to be it…” *pause* “Oh, wait… I didn’t press the start button.” *pause, then my monitoring starts flooding with orders* “Now it’s working.”
Me: *screaming internally but somehow managing to keep my cool* “Well, there you go. Have a nice day.” *hangs up*