(Regrettably, our local university is the main reason that county STD rates are the second-highest in the state (the highest-ranking county is home to a naval base). Outbreaks are common and rather a grim joke with local healthcare providers. The county has purchased a new emergency radio system and one of their officers has arrived to train our staff on how to use the equipment.)
Instructor: “The great thing about this system is that it is linked to over two hundred towers, state-wide. This means that if you need to, you can communicate not only throughout the county, but with other jurisdictions as well. For example; let’s say you have to set up some kind of emergency clinic at the University for… I don’t know, what’s an epidemic that the students might experience there?”
Me: *without thinking* “Probably chlamydia.”
(My boss shushed me, but our director of nursing almost fell off her chair from laughing so hard.)
Bizarre, Employees, Massachusetts, Politics, Retail, USA | Working | January 31, 2019
(I work in a major retail chain. One night, we get an unusual truck delivery. Our manager is waiting by the dock with us as we get ready to unload it.)
Manager: *sigh* “All right, everyone. This is going to seem crazy, but I’ve confirmed with the home office that the delivery inside is definitely intended to be ours just the way it is, so just go with it.”
Coworker: “Wait. What the heck is inside?”
Manager: “You’ll see.”
(Shortly after, the truck driver opens the door to reveal an absolutely absurd amount of tangerines. My coworkers and I alternate between staring at the tangerines in amazement and each other in shock and confusion.)
Coworker: “There’s no way this is right. I get that we’re a busy supercenter and all, but there’s no way even we can sell all these oranges before a whole bunch goes bad.”
Manager: “Yep, that’s how I feel, but apparently someone higher up than me disagrees.”
Me: *as I’m sliding my pallet jack under the first pallet* “What reason could there possibly be to make this seem like a good idea?”
Driver: “You want to know what these oranges are for? This is all about that Obamacare!”
(Suddenly, everyone stops what they’re doing to process what the driver has said.)
Manager: “What… What does that have to do with oranges? No, actually, what does that have to do with anything right now?”
Driver: “That’s Obamacare for you; it doesn’t make any sense!”
(We quickly gave up trying to figure out what the driver was talking about. For the next week, all our nightly meetings included a manager urging us all to get a bag of tangerines on the way home. Once the story of the delivery had spread, we would all say goodbye to each other with, “Don’t forget your Obamacare oranges!”)
At The Checkout, Jerk, Retail, Tennessee, USA | Right | July 8, 2018
(At the store where I work, it is policy to card for ALL tobacco and alcohol purchases. It doesn’t matter if the person has grey hair and more wrinkles than a Shar Pei; we still have to card them. Failure to card can lose me my job and cost me and the store a hefty fine. The customer I am serving here appears to be in at least his 60s.)
Customer: “I’ll take a can of [chewing tobacco], please.”
Me: “Certainly.” *unlocks the tobacco cabinet and gets out the can* “May I see your ID, please?”
Customer: “You’re kidding me!”
Customer’s Buddy: “The state of things now! Is this an Obama rule? This is ridiculous how things are nowadays! Is his one of Obama’s rules?”
Me: “No, it is a store rule.”
Customer & His Buddy: *laughs* “A store rule?!”
(The customer handed me his ID, I typed in the birthdate and told him his total, and he paid and left, both of them still laughing. This is not the first time a customer has railed about “Obama taking away their rights” when asked for ID
Bizarre, Jerk, Missouri, Retail, Silly, USA | Right | January 15, 2018
(I work at an office supply store in the printing department. It is a Saturday evening, and a coworker and I are currently putting out ads for the next week. We have just closed our doors, and everything is going fine until we get a call. I don’t pay much attention until my coworker calls me over to take it, as it is for my department. Keep in mind that we are currently closed.)
Me: “Thank you for holding. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”
Customer: “Yeah, I was wondering if I could get a price quote on some prints?”
Me: “Sure thing! What are you looking to get?”
(The customer proceeds to describe what he wants, which goes on for a few minutes. The conversation goes well, nothing out of the ordinary, until we reach the end of the conversation.)
Customer: “Sounds good! What time do you all close?”
Me: “We closed about 15 minutes ago, sir, but we open back up at 10:00 tomorrow morning.”
Customer: “Aw, man, really? I am actually just right outside. Could you make an exception?”
Me: “No, I’m afraid not, but like I said, we open back up tomorrow.”
Customer: “But I’m from out of town and I really need this done.”
Me: “I’m sorry, but we are closed.”
Customer: “But I’m from Texas; does that change anything?”
Me: “Unfortunately not, sir. We are still closed, regardless.”
(We go back and forth like this for several minutes. He is getting irate the longer it goes on, and so am I. I try to keep the friendliest voice I can muster. It seems like he has finally decided to give up, until the customer says something I never expected.)
Me: “I’m sorry, sir. Like I said before, we are closed.”
Customer: *in a threatening tone* “Do I need to call Obama to confirm that you’re closed?”
Me: *legitimately speechless*
Customer: *click*
(After I hung up the phone, I told my coworker and manager. They both got a pretty good kick out of it! It was the strangest phone call I have ever received. We also never did get that phone call from Obama.)
(It’s the day before taxes are due and a few last minute customers are mailing out their returns. Customer #1 is addressing his envelope while Customer #2 is filling out a money order for a payment.)
(I work in a high-end stationery boutique, whose clientele is generally upper middle class and upper class white women in their 40s to 60s – the sort of people whose spending habits didn’t really change when the economy nose dived. This customer appeared to be no different, and the address on the check she paid with confirmed as much.)
Customer: “Where’s your clearance section?”
Me: “We actually don’t have clearance sales, outside of our semi-annual sales after Christmas and Father’s Day.”
Customer: “So everything in here is full-priced?”
Me: “Yes, ma’am.”
Customer: *sighs loudly* “Fine, I’ll pay full-price. But I really need to be saving every penny, with that black man as president
(It is around the time the 2008 Presidential campaign is beginning to pick up steam, and since my family’s African American, everyone is buzzing about Barack Obama, although some of the older relatives are rather skeptical.)
Cousin: “Can you believe this? It looks like he may have a shot.”
Uncle: “Huh. He won’t win.”
Me: “What makes you think that?”
Uncle: “With the way this country works, he’ll never make it past the primaries. Mark my words.”
Me: “Actually, the primaries are over. He did make it.”
Uncle: “Oh… uh… he still won’t make it.”
(I really wish I could’ve been there to see his reaction when Obama won the national election… for both terms.)
Friends, Health & Body, Jerk, Money, Pharmacy, UK | Friendly | May 16, 2019
(A friend and I have just gotten piercings. I have some already, so I suggest we get ibuprofen to handle the immediate swelling and pain. We go to our local pharmacy.)
Friend: “Which one do we need?”
Me: “One that has ibuprofen in it.”
Friend: “Ah.” *picks up the most expensive branded box*
Me: “Ugh, I’d rather go with the generic kind.” *picks up my own box*
Friend: “But look at it. It’ll probably kill you!”
Me: “They are literally the same. Yours is branded, though, so they charge extortionate prices.”
Friend: “No, this one is better.”
(I take his box and show him the ingredients on the back. By a stroke of luck, they are EXACTLY the same.)
Friend: *after spending a long time comparing* “Mine is still better!”
(I shrugged and we paid for our own painkillers. He paid £3.49, while I paid 39p.)
Bad Behavior, Great Stuff, Parents/Guardians, Pharmacy, UK, Wild & Unruly | Right | May 15, 2019
(I am at the pharmacy with my one-year-old in her pushchair, waiting for my prescription to be filled. It’s five minutes before closing and the staff have been very helpful so far. A mother with a young girl storms in, slams down a prescription, and shouts at the employee, “And don’t take f****** forever!” Her daughter begins running around the store, picking up items and dropping them, screeching, and being annoying. Then, she spots the pushchair.)
Girl: *to me* “I want to pick up the baby!”
Me: “No, sorry, she’s not well at the moment. You don’t want to catch her cold.”
Girl: “I want the baby, now!”
Me: “No, no picking up or playing with baby today.”
(The girl goes to grab my daughter and I move the pushchair out of reach.)
Me: *to mother* “Could you come get your daughter, please? She’s going to hurt herself.”
(The mother looks at me, smirks, and looks away. The little girl then proceeds to fling herself at my daughter, but as I once again move the pram, she ends up face-planting into a basket of body wash. Cue screaming, crying, and a full-blown tantrum.)
Mother: *comes straight into my face, without picking up or checking on her daughter* “How f****** dare you?! You did that on purpose! I could f****** sue! I’ll smash your head in. You’re gonna be penniless when I’m done with you, b****!”
Me: *in my quiet, furious Mum Voice* “You might actually want to check on your daughter, though by the amount of noise she’s making I don’t think she’s dying. I’d like to see you try and sue. I asked you twice to control your daughter; if you’d actually been watching her this wouldn’t have happened. Now, get out of my face before I move you myself. Besides, I’m sure the CCTV of you threatening me would look lovely on Facebook.”
(The mother silently grabs her daughter and sits down, staring at me like I’m made out of spiders. She grabs her prescription and forces her daughter out the door as the girl shouts for a lollipop.)
Cashier: “Mrs. [My Name], here’s your prescription and the Yankee candle you ordered.”
Me: “I didn’t order anything, sorry.”
Cashier: “I guess this one’s on me, then. Thank you; that woman has been a nightmare for years, and no one’s stood up to her before.”
Me: *laughs* “If it hadn’t been for my daughter, I probably wouldn’t have, either. You know what they say about mother bears and their cubs
Ignoring & Inattentive, Missouri, Parents/Guardians, Pharmacy, USA | Related | April 27, 2019
(My mom and I are from Michigan, but we’re on vacation in St. Louis. We stop at a drugstore to buy a bag of ice. My mom goes into the store while I sit in the car to listen to the radio. She comes back out to the car 30 seconds later.)
Me: “What are you doing?”
Mom: “I forgot my rewards card.”
Me: “Your rewards card is for [Drugstore #1 ]. This is a [Drugstore #2 ]. In fact, I’m pretty sure there isn’t a single [Drugstore #1 ] in the entire area.”
(She stopped for a moment and walked back into the store. I love my mother, but I swear she can be ditzy at times.)
California, Employees, Extra Stupid, Pharmacy, USA | Healthy | April 22, 2019
(I’m at the pharmacy to pick up one of my regular prescriptions. This one is about $5. After the pharmacy tech verifies my identity, the following occurs
Tech: “Okay, just this medication? That will be $45.”
Me: “Wait, what? It’s usually $5. Why is it so expensive?”
Tech: “Hmm, looks like we didn’t run it through your insurance.”
Me: “…”
Tech: “…”
Me: “Could you run it through my insurance?”
Tech: *surprised* “You want me to do that?”
Me: “Yes. Yes, I do.”
(I did get my medication for the right price and headed home. This was over a year ago, and I’m still baffled why asking for it to be run through my insurance was such an odd request.)
Crazy Requests, Criminal & Illegal, North Carolina, Pharmacy, USA | Right | April 10, 2019
(I am a pharmacist. While I’m on lunch, a customer comes up to the counter while my technician is helping another customer in the drive-thru.)
Customer: “Do you have a pharmacist working? It’s an emergency! I need to speak to her now!”
(My technician calls me back to the pharmacy. The customer sees me arrive and tries to stop me outside the pharmacy, but I make her wait until I get in the pharmacy.)
Customer: “I just bought these pills off the street, and they are supposed to be Xanax. But I looked on my phone with Google, and it said they weren’t Xanax. I need you to tell me what this is now. It’s an emergency that I know what this is.”
Me: *looking blankly* “I will not identify any medication that is purchased illegally.”
Customer: “I need to know what this is. It’s an emergency! Why won’t you tell me what it is?”
Me: “Because it was illegally purchased, and I’m not helping people purchase drugs on the street.”
(She looked at me for a few seconds and then walked off.)
Employees, Florida, Jerk, Pharmacy, USA | Healthy | April 9, 2019
(I take 150 mg of a seizure medication per day. It does not come in 150 mg tablets, though, so my doctor has written two prescriptions for it, one for 50 mg and one for 100 mg. I’ve been taking this dosage for over two years. I’ve used the same pharmacy the entire time. This happens one day when I go to pick up my prescription.)
Me: “Hello, I’m here to pick up my prescription.” *gives information*
New Tech: “Oh, that’s weird; I actually have two here for you. Do you take the 50- or 100-mg dose?”
Me: “I take both. My prescription is for 150 mg, and that’s the only way it can be filled.”
New Tech: “That’s not right! You can only take one or the other, not both.”
Me: “I assure you it’s correct. If you look at my records, you’ll see that the same prescription has been filled for over two years. I know most people either take one or the other, but it’s a seizure medication, so the dose can actually go up to 400 mg based on symptoms and therapeutic levels.”
(The tech continues to argue with me that I can only get one or the other because most people take either 50 mg or 100 mg, not 150 mg. I ask her to get the pharmacist. The tech goes over and tells him what’s going on. He looks up, see who it is, waves, and tells her that yes, it’s correct. She starts arguing with him that it cannot be correct. He just takes my prescription from her, walks over, and checks me out himself.)
Pharmacist: “Sorry about that. Here your prescription. I’ve added a note to your account just in case this is a problem at any point in the future.”
(The next time I came in, another new tech questioned me on which prescription I took of two again. I told her both. She told me to hold on, as there was a note on my account. She started laughing. The note read, “Don’t argue with her; the prescription is correct. Yes, it’s really both. If you’ve got a problem with it, come see me to sign off on it.”)
Crazy Requests, Criminal & Illegal, Georgia, Pharmacy, Retail, USA | Right | April 7, 2019
(I work at a pharmacy in a low-income neighborhood. Our prices are fairly high compared to what our local clientele can actually afford, and most of our customers either only shop for the items on sale or take the bus up the road a few miles to a grocery store. We’ve tried to get corporate to lower our prices, but they refuse to see reason. On this day, a young man enters the store and asks for assistance locating a high-end facial soap. I help him find it and we bring it to my register to cash him out.)
Me: “All right, your total comes to $15.”
Customer: *hands me cash, six dollars less than he needs to pay*
Me: “Oh… Oops! You handed me $9. Did you mean to give me a ten instead of one of the one-dollar bills?”
Customer: “That’s all I have.” *looks at me expectantly*
Me: “Um… okay. I can hold the item here if you want to go get more money. Or we can go look for something that isn’t so expensive.”
Customer: “I don’t have any more money. That’s all I have.”
Me: “Okay, well, let’s go look at the other products. I’m sure we can find something in your price range.”
Customer: *getting agitated* “No! I want that one. I need it for my acne!”
Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but you only have $9. The product is $15. You either need to bring me more money or find something else.”
Customer: “But I want that one.”
Me: “Then you’ll need to go home and get more money. I can hold it back here so you don’t have to find it again.”
Customer: “I already said I ain’t got more money!”
Me: “Well, then, I’m sorry, but you can’t buy this item.”
Customer: “BUT I WANT IT! I NEED IT FOR MY ACNE!”
(We go back and forth for several minutes, and the customer is getting more and more angry. Eventually, I’ve had enough.)
Me: “There’s nothing more I can do for you if you can’t afford this item and don’t want anything else.”
(The young man tries to snatch the item off the counter, but I grab it first.)
Me: “Sir, you cannot have something you have not paid for. That’s stealing. Either purchase something or please leave.”
Customer: “F*** YOU!” *storms out*
(I inform my manager of the incident, including that the young man tried to grab the soap and bolt.)
Manager: *looks at product* “This isn’t even for acne! It’s for treating extremely dry skin, like psoriasis and eczema! There’s so much grease in this soap it would have made his acne worse.”
Me: “I guess it’s a good thing I was quicker than him. He probably would have used it, then tried to return it saying it wasn’t working. This isn’t the first time a customer has tried to swipe an unpaid order off the counter and run out.”
Manager: “I think we’ll start keeping unpaid purchases in the bag-well.” *the recessed area in front of the cashier that holds the plastic bags, which is out of reach of the customer*
(The young man never came back, and with our new policy of keeping unpaid transactions out of the customers’ reach, we’ve had a lot fewer attempts to grab “purchases” and run out. I hope corporate listens to us and lowers prices soon.)
Extra Stupid, Health & Body, Pharmacy, UK | Right | March 29, 2019
(A customer comes to the counter with three boxes of different medicines. I inspect them.)
Me: “I’m sorry, but I’ll only be able to sell two of these to you. This one should have the same effect and this one… I would recommend putting this one back.”
Customer: “Just sell me all of them.”
Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t.”
Customer: *huffs* “Just put them through separately. The register should let you do it.”
Me: “No. I’m not legally allowed to sell you all three. It could be life-threatening if you take all of them at once.”
Customer: “No, it isn’t. I have a friend who mixes them all the time and chugs a load of vodka. Knocks her out for several hours. Great stuff!”
British Columbia, Canada, Jerk, Pharmacy | Right | March 20, 2019
(I drop off a prescription at the pharmacy counter.)
Pharmacist: “We’re pretty busy. Do you want to wait or come back in about an hour?”
Me: “I have some other errands to run. I’ll come back around 1:30.”
Pharmacist: “That should be fine.”
(I come back about 1:40. The woman ahead of me in line at the pick-up counter is obviously angry and snarking at the shy, young pharmacist. Eventually, she steams off.)
Me: “Hi. Do you have a prescription ready for [My Name]?”
Pharmacist: “I’m so sorry. We’ve been really busy. It will probably be another fifteen minutes or so. Would you like us to deliver it to your home?”
Me: “Oh, no. That’s fine. I’ll just run over to [supermarket] and come back.”
(About twenty minutes later
Pharmacist: “We’re just getting your order together. Do you mind having a seat for a couple of minutes?”
Me: “No problem.”
(A few minutes later, she calls me up to get my prescription.)
Pharmacist: “Thank you so much for being so patient. I’ve already had two people yell at me today.”
Me: “No problem. It’s not like it was your fault.”
Pharmacist: “They don’t seem to care about that. Thank you so much again.”
Bizarre, Illinois, Insurance, Pharmacy, USA | Healthy | March 14, 2019
(My insurance company has decided to stop covering one of my prescriptions for unknown reasons. I get a notice from them on a Friday afternoon, as well as an email from the pharmacy, that the prescription in question is due for a refill. Since it’s Friday at three pm, I figure I’ll just pay the cash price for it this month and call my insurance company next week. I click the link in the email to refill and go back to work. An hour later, I get a text update saying the prescription has been put on hold. I call my pharmacy.)
Me: “Hi. My name is [My Name], and I’m calling regarding my prescription I just sent for a refill.”
Rep #1 : “Sure, I’ll look at that… Oh, it looks like your insurance won’t cover it for whatever reason.”
Me: “I know. I’ll just pay the cash price this month. How much will it be?”
(I wave and walk out. I drive back over the next day, where there is yet another rep behind the counter.)
Me: “Hi, I’m [My Name], and there should be one ready for me.”
Rep #3 : “Yes, it’s filled and ready to go. One minute while I grab it!”
(He grabs it and starts ringing me out.)
Rep #3 : “Oh, um… I need to get the pharmacist. Something isn’t correct.”
Me: “If it’s the copay, I know about it! It’s not an issue!”
([Rep #3 ] disappears into the back. I throw up my hands in frustration. He comes back out a few minutes later.)
Rep #3 : “There’s a copay on this. There shouldn’t be. We can look into this for you.”
Me: “LISTEN TO ME. You are the third person that I’ve explained this to. I know about the copay. It’s fine. My insurance company screwed up. All I want to do is pay and go home!”
Rep #3 : “I apologize for the issue. I don’t know what happened with your insurance… Hold on. Did you say you are going to pay?!”
Me: *through gritted teeth* “YES.”
Rep #3 : “Oh. OH! Yes, I’d be happy to process that for you! No problem!”
(I can only imagine how many temper tantrums people have thrown over copays to prompt that reaction from THREE pharmacy techs!)
(I’m in line in the pharmacy waiting for my prescription. There are elderly gentlemen in front of me and behind me. The pharmacist is at the counter with a new trainee. All of a sudden, an old lady at the front of the store faints.)
Pharmacist: *to trainee* “I’m going to help, but don’t give this medication out until I get back, because I haven’t signed it yet.”
(The pharmacist goes to the front to assist the old lady and another worker whilst paging for the manager.)
Elderly Man: *in front to trainee* “That’s mine. Give that to me.”
Trainee: “I’m really sorry, sir, but the pharmacist is just helping another customer and I can’t give it out until he’s signed it.”
Elderly Man: “Can’t you sign it?”
Trainee: “Unfortunately, I can’t because I’m training and it’s only my first day, but I can ring your other goods up while you wait.” *indicates to his basket*
Elderly Man: “But I’ve been waiting for ages and this is ridiculous!”
(Strictly speaking, this is not true; he went into the store in front of me and we’ve only been here less than five minutes.)
Elderly Man: “Where’s your manager?”
Trainee: “The manager is up at the front with the other customer. The pharmacist shouldn’t be long back now that she’s arrived.”
Elderly Man: “This is ridiculous. I’m a customer, too!”
(The trainee looks close to tears and I can’t take his behaviour anymore. We can all see the sick customer at the front, as it’s a small store.)
Me: “She’s just given you a perfectly reasonable excuse why she can’t give you the medication, and you can see why the pharmacist and other staff are busy. You need to stop being rude to her.”
(The man just harrumphs at me. The pharmacist returns and deals with the grumpy elderly man, and he shuffles off.)
Elderly Man #2 : *behind me, taps me on the shoulder* “Good girl.”
Me: *to trainee* “You didn’t deserve that, and he was being rude and aggressive.”
Trainee: *as she finishes serving me* “Thank you.”
Me: “No problem. I used to work in retail and know what some customers are like.”
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